Healing Heartbreak - Your step-by-step plan
HEALING HEARTBREAK -
YOUR PLAN TO GETTING YOUR LIFE BACK
Heartbreak has happened to all of us. Whether it is the longing the have your first love back, or the desire to reconcile - the smiles and tears of love it is part of life and the essence of being alive. Women usually take a break-up harder than men, because we are such emotional creatures. Whether healing takes a week, a month or even years, the healing process is what makes us stronger.
DON'T FALL TOO FAST
The trap most of us women fall into is falling for the first handsome guy who her pays some attention. The problem with this practice is that the other party doesn't neccesarily feel the same way. He could me smiling at you to boost his ego, or only using you. As hard as it is to accept, the male species is much less sensitive to emotion than women. The best advice is to not set yourself up for heartbreak by appearing easy or eager. Let him come to you. Don't make the first phone call. If he is truly interested, he will make the first move to get you. If you have been dumped during the first month of dating, chances are he didn't work hard enough to get you and that you made yourself too available. Play hard to get - you WILL reap the benefits in the long run. Remember - One usually appreciates the value of something he has worked hard for, with much more respect.
DITCH THE LONELINESS
Some women fall into a pit of depression after being dumped. Of the 100 women I have interviewed, 86% said that the worst part of being dumped is being lonely. If loneliness is the cause of your depression. Before going to seeing a professional, try to remedy the root of the problem first. Find ways to pass time. If you are not into excersizing, try going for a brisk walk. The fresh air will do you a world of good. Go to the DVD store and rent your favourite movie to watch with girlfriends. Start painting. Get a pet. Do anything that will keep your mind off the man who has shattered your heart into a million pieces.
USE THE TIME FOR SELF-IMPROVEMENT
Now that you aren't together anymore, you probably have plenty of time on your hands. Use this time for self improvement, and you will notice the boost in self-eesteem. Further your career with a part time, correspondence course or submit a short story to a writing competition. Whatever you do, use and harness the benefits of your talents. Plant a garden full of flowers - watch them grow and bloom, and enjoy the fruits of your hard work.
GO HERBAL
There are plenty of herbal remedies on the market that boost your mood and creativity and dampen the inner pain to some extent. Although it is not completely the cure for your problems, it may help you to cope. CALOMILE has calming and soothing benefits for the broken soul. This herb can be served in a tea to sleep through the restless nights of worry. GINSENG is a wonderful remedy for stress as it can calm you down. Emotional stress can be physically and mentally draining. Therefore this herb can be administered boost energy levels, reduce tearfulness and boost creative juices. Ginseng is usually available in a solution of tablets. I find t
hat the solution is absorbed into the blood stream much quicker. LAVENDER can be grown in your own garden. And can be added to bath water for a relaxing hot soak.
You can also make a herbal mask to moisturise your face and reveal the true beauty of your skin. When you look good, you feel much better. Cleanse your face with cold milk and tea to energise the skin. (The tannins in the tea bags will lessen the swelling underneath your eyes from all the crying). Follow this with a mask made of mashed avocado. If you are prone to acne (usually during stressful times, the skin is vulnerable to breakouts) add a few drops of tea tree oil. Follow this routine every day.
GET A MAKEOVER
For any woman, a new look is as good as a holiday. Buy clothes that make you feel good. Try new shades of makeup or get higlights for your hair, but make sure that the shades compliment your new colour. Try shades that highlight your features and hide your blemishes. If you are very light skin, don't go too light or dark. Stick to light chestnut or brownish blonde. If you have reddish tones, don't opt for too red, but a lovely spicy brown full of high and low tones. TIP Make sure you have not washed your hair at lease one day before colouring. The colouring process strips the hair of it's oils and texture. Protect your hair during the dyeing process with mother nature's own oils.
EAT RIGHT
It is very important that you eat right whilst following this plan. Studies have shown that some women tend to eat more when stressed, whilst others don't eat at all. It is very important regularly. Stay away from sugar and caffiene as they make you feel good for only a short time, but burned out and exhausted after a few hours. You don't need this when you have a heartbreak draining all your energy already. Studies also proved that eating a diet rich in OMEGA 3 and 6 can help you cope in stressful times. I put this to test and after a few weeks, of eating salmon, tuna and other oily fish, I noticed that my emotions were more balanced. I had fewer mood swings, my blood pressure and energy levels normalised and my hair was in much better condition, which boosted my confidence. Have a low fat, high protein breakfast and you will notice that your energy levels will improve and you will eat less. You might probably drop a few pounds - just what your confidence levels need at this very moment.
LET GO
Take the time to heal, even if you need to take a few weeks off work to go on a vacation. Don't start dating again if you have not completely healed from this heartbreak, you just might fall into the same trap all over again. Remember that you are a unique individual with many talents. You do not need a man in your life to be bold, strong, ambitious and all the other good qualities you already have. You have all these good traits inside you. Focus on the good things and let the bad things (including him) go. Make a list of all the bad things he has ever done to you. Tear the paper into pieces and set it alight. Watch the flames destroy all this bad things and forgive him. Stop thinking about it - just let go.
Just remember that you were a strong, dignified individual before he came into your life and therefore, you can be the same person you were without him. Remember the good times for what it is, only memories. As they say - It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.
YOUR PLAN TO GETTING YOUR LIFE BACK
Heartbreak has happened to all of us. Whether it is the longing the have your first love back, or the desire to reconcile - the smiles and tears of love it is part of life and the essence of being alive. Women usually take a break-up harder than men, because we are such emotional creatures. Whether healing takes a week, a month or even years, the healing process is what makes us stronger.
DON'T FALL TOO FAST
The trap most of us women fall into is falling for the first handsome guy who her pays some attention. The problem with this practice is that the other party doesn't neccesarily feel the same way. He could me smiling at you to boost his ego, or only using you. As hard as it is to accept, the male species is much less sensitive to emotion than women. The best advice is to not set yourself up for heartbreak by appearing easy or eager. Let him come to you. Don't make the first phone call. If he is truly interested, he will make the first move to get you. If you have been dumped during the first month of dating, chances are he didn't work hard enough to get you and that you made yourself too available. Play hard to get - you WILL reap the benefits in the long run. Remember - One usually appreciates the value of something he has worked hard for, with much more respect.
DITCH THE LONELINESS
Some women fall into a pit of depression after being dumped. Of the 100 women I have interviewed, 86% said that the worst part of being dumped is being lonely. If loneliness is the cause of your depression. Before going to seeing a professional, try to remedy the root of the problem first. Find ways to pass time. If you are not into excersizing, try going for a brisk walk. The fresh air will do you a world of good. Go to the DVD store and rent your favourite movie to watch with girlfriends. Start painting. Get a pet. Do anything that will keep your mind off the man who has shattered your heart into a million pieces.
USE THE TIME FOR SELF-IMPROVEMENT
Now that you aren't together anymore, you probably have plenty of time on your hands. Use this time for self improvement, and you will notice the boost in self-eesteem. Further your career with a part time, correspondence course or submit a short story to a writing competition. Whatever you do, use and harness the benefits of your talents. Plant a garden full of flowers - watch them grow and bloom, and enjoy the fruits of your hard work.
GO HERBAL
There are plenty of herbal remedies on the market that boost your mood and creativity and dampen the inner pain to some extent. Although it is not completely the cure for your problems, it may help you to cope. CALOMILE has calming and soothing benefits for the broken soul. This herb can be served in a tea to sleep through the restless nights of worry. GINSENG is a wonderful remedy for stress as it can calm you down. Emotional stress can be physically and mentally draining. Therefore this herb can be administered boost energy levels, reduce tearfulness and boost creative juices. Ginseng is usually available in a solution of tablets. I find t
You can also make a herbal mask to moisturise your face and reveal the true beauty of your skin. When you look good, you feel much better. Cleanse your face with cold milk and tea to energise the skin. (The tannins in the tea bags will lessen the swelling underneath your eyes from all the crying). Follow this with a mask made of mashed avocado. If you are prone to acne (usually during stressful times, the skin is vulnerable to breakouts) add a few drops of tea tree oil. Follow this routine every day.
GET A MAKEOVER
For any woman, a new look is as good as a holiday. Buy clothes that make you feel good. Try new shades of makeup or get higlights for your hair, but make sure that the shades compliment your new colour. Try shades that highlight your features and hide your blemishes. If you are very light skin, don't go too light or dark. Stick to light chestnut or brownish blonde. If you have reddish tones, don't opt for too red, but a lovely spicy brown full of high and low tones. TIP Make sure you have not washed your hair at lease one day before colouring. The colouring process strips the hair of it's oils and texture. Protect your hair during the dyeing process with mother nature's own oils.
EAT RIGHT
It is very important that you eat right whilst following this plan. Studies have shown that some women tend to eat more when stressed, whilst others don't eat at all. It is very important regularly. Stay away from sugar and caffiene as they make you feel good for only a short time, but burned out and exhausted after a few hours. You don't need this when you have a heartbreak draining all your energy already. Studies also proved that eating a diet rich in OMEGA 3 and 6 can help you cope in stressful times. I put this to test and after a few weeks, of eating salmon, tuna and other oily fish, I noticed that my emotions were more balanced. I had fewer mood swings, my blood pressure and energy levels normalised and my hair was in much better condition, which boosted my confidence. Have a low fat, high protein breakfast and you will notice that your energy levels will improve and you will eat less. You might probably drop a few pounds - just what your confidence levels need at this very moment.
LET GO
Take the time to heal, even if you need to take a few weeks off work to go on a vacation. Don't start dating again if you have not completely healed from this heartbreak, you just might fall into the same trap all over again. Remember that you are a unique individual with many talents. You do not need a man in your life to be bold, strong, ambitious and all the other good qualities you already have. You have all these good traits inside you. Focus on the good things and let the bad things (including him) go. Make a list of all the bad things he has ever done to you. Tear the paper into pieces and set it alight. Watch the flames destroy all this bad things and forgive him. Stop thinking about it - just let go.
Just remember that you were a strong, dignified individual before he came into your life and therefore, you can be the same person you were without him. Remember the good times for what it is, only memories. As they say - It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all.
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