Dating “again” for the first time in a long time can be very nerve-wracking, especially for seniors.  If you’re fifty above, and decided to re-enter the dating world after some decades of being on the dating sidelines, you may find yourself in an entirely new world of dating dilemmas and challenges.  The uncertainty of what you’d wear, where you’d go, and what you can talk about may seem very overwhelming.

Moreover, there’d be some hesitations before the first date –thoughts of whether your date will be nice, or if he or she will like you, and even fears of how the dating etiquette has changed from the last time you’ve dated.  While there aren’t any absolutes in senior dating, there are some tested and real strategies that can help overcome your fears and increase the chances of successful senior dating.

Encourage conversation
The main purpose of a first date is to decide if you want a second date or not.  With this mind, it’s important to plan a date that “encourages” talks and allows the both of you to get to know each other.   Avoid activities that just make you sit silently, such as plays and movies.

Tailor the date
The date should be tailored to include some common hobbies, shared value, or interests that will help in establishing immediate connection on something meaningful to the both of you.

Enhance the date
If you’ve planned a “meal date”, enhance it.  You can choose to have it lunchtime and mix it with a couple of fun activities so the both of you will have more things to chat about while eating.   Dinner in most cases suggests more “intimacy” than you’re actually ready to handle –this can be an awkward situation for two near-strangers, and creating conversations can be more difficult.

Be open
There are times when senior dating becomes more difficult because of the “guilt” feelings.  The thought of finding a new relationship can bring up the spiteful little emotion of “guilt”, and this can be hard to overcome.  Nevertheless, if you look at it in a more positive and different way, you should realize that you don’t need to feel guilt because you’re trying to reestablish your life.  Keep an open mind, and realize that you’re not trying to replace a loved one who past away or erasing the past, you’re simply moving forward to the future.

Consider group dates
If you really can’t get over the nervousness of senior dating, think about making the first date a “group date” with some friends, or even participating in group activities like charity auctions or wine tasting.

Exit Strategy
It is always good to be safe and be smart –have an “exit strategy”.  The majority of first dates will be with a person you don’t know very well, so be in public places and tell a trusted friend where you’re meeting and who you’re meeting with.  If you begin to feel uneasy with the person you’re with, then don’t hesitate to leave politely.

“Don’t put all eggs in one basket”
If your date does not turn out to be the person you hoped she or he would be, don’t be discouraged.  You were able to meet a new person, you were able to use your “conversation skills”, plus gained more knowledge on what you really want and don’t want in a future partner.

Senior dating is never a matter of age; it’s simply a matter of overcoming the fears and dilemmas of finding a new relationship with the right person “one more time”.  Whether it’s true love you’re searching for or companionship, senior dating opens a wonderful door to meeting a special person to match the search.